26.11.09

/////////JESUS /////////// and Attack attack / Color Morale pt2

But the music was good, the punches were soft and came with an apology. But I had fun. I actually met some really nice people on this tour. It would break my moms heart if she read this, but I’m having the hardest time with it comes to faith and religion.
That’s a whole nuther* topic
Anyways I met a sweet guy. I kept feeling like I wanted to talk to him.
It wasn’t the fact he was:
1. actually really good looking
2. the fact he had a box with “please tip me, I need money to eat”
3. looked like he could be jesus hot younger bro
4. dressed really nice
5. kept on staring and smiling at me

lets name him Jeusjr. I finally jut walked up to this guy that was actually intimidating for me. I shook his hand and told him who I was, what my job was at the venue and how his day was. He had such great presence and spoke kindly. It was nice talking to someone who wanted to have a real conversation. Finally drinking was brought up and I said I refrain from that and all other substances. He told me he lives the same way and he was a Christian.
I told him I’m not too sure about religion and belief right now. Then the topic changed and then we both lost track and started back to work. I kept thinking about our short conversation about staying clean and living life for me and/or god.
As I kept passing out promotion flyers and sticking them on cars in the cold, I kept thinking of what’s been bothering me for awhile now:
The thoughts of us all just being complex organisms and I could die at any minute and it wouldn’t matter, I would be just like a dead animal that we eat. It is haunting me daily. I sometimes cant even get out o bed with the theory of us not meaning anything, just being intelligent animals. The question “what is the point”
Just repeats over and over. The fact I have asked friends to leave me alone has given me a lot of time to try and accept whatever “life” is. I feel so unimportant and poor.
At least I bought the Oxford shoes.
Later on when a sweetheart band named [look up band I bought CD from] were playing Jesusjr came from behind me, tapped me on the shoulder, and stood closely parallel to my back, and whispered in my ear, “if you ever need someone to talk to about morality and everything, you can talk to me” and then gave me his number.

It was strangely relieving.
It was good timing.
He didn’t preach, he didn’t bare his testimony, he just gave me the option to be open for me.
Thank you Jesusjr.

Also I met a sweetheart call him alperks
He is from the band, OurLastNight
He just kept on smiling and talking to me like a gentleman. At the end of the night I told him about how I value good guys in the music industry. He told me that next time in town, he’ll talk to is boys about doing an acoustic show for a fundraiser for the boys&girls club. I’m going to set it up. Super stoked.
Also ran into a friend that I lost trust in, she became too close of friends with a student of mine, and the student said they were actually dating. They both have proof and told me that each other is crazy. Its hard to figure out who to trust,
but what’s important is that that…. I am the guys mentor and I need to be there for him, and she is an adult and doesn’t need me. Im glad I had the time I did as her friend, she was a lot of fun. I only wish they weren’t deceitful. It wasent fair for them to have any friendship that could effect my job. So I told her we couldn’t be friends, and I told the boy he is on the line to have me be there for him. Don’t bite te hand that feeds you.
She went to that show and we both were nice and talked for a sec.
it was good, but I don’t think im ready to trust people
I do it too much and history always repeats for me.
BAM night.

Nuther* utah slang for Another

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